A prayer that I should be worthy of not being fooled by all the confusions that abound, even if that should lead to me being expelled completely from society. A prayer that I should accept all insults with love, and keep in mind at all times the fundamental principle that the purpose of every descent is that it should result in an ascent: that everything that I am and that I have is a gift from Hashem that I have neither earned nor deserve, and that it should all bring me to complete and utter humility. Finally that I should at all times, whatever the situation, keep these principles in mind.

The fundamental principle of the Blasphemer and the one who Gathered Wood.

The fundamental principle that the whole point of the descent is the ascent.

    Master of the Universe, for whom all is possible, please help me to find clarity amongst all that perplexes me, to escape from all my confusions and suffer no more bewilderment. Even if I should be expelled by society, or even driven out from Klal Yisroel, this should cause me no confusion whatsoever. Please protect me at all times from even the slightest descent, spiritual or otherwise.

    Please guard me in order that no one, not even the most perverted person, should be able to cause me to collapse in the slightest way. Whether I should be expelled from the Yeshiva or even from the Camp of Israel I should accept everything with love.

    Help me to believe that all my suffering is causing all my sins to be forgiven, both in this and also in all previous reincarnations: that it is also an exoneration for the first 130 years after the Creation during which Adam created evil spirits and demons from whom were created all the Nazis, ISIS and Al Qaeda.

    Please help me to be worthy of accepting all my torment and anguish only with love, just like Rabbi Akiva, who even as they were scraping off his skin with red-hot iron combs continued reciting the Shema Yisroel with an ultimate love for You. As opposed to Elisha ben Avuya, who literally became a heretic because he was not able to accept everything that he went through with love, in the aspect of ‘the uppermost [in this world] are below [in the World to Come], and the lowly [in this world] are above [in the World to Come] (Pesachim 50a).’

    And even when a person sees that he is going through an absolute nosedive either spiritual or social, he has to keep in mind that precisely this fall is what is going to raise him up in the end to the highest heights. The crucially important thing to remember is that one must never despair from Hashem’s mercy. That every single fall is for the purpose and ultimate goal of him being raised up. The true and exclusive reason for each and every spiritual or social fall is to bring the person to have a truly broken heart, that he should understand and believe his own utter worthlessness, the truly pitiful spiritual level that he is on because this is the only thing that will guard him from having the slightest thought of pride, G*d forbid.

    Similarly, to the contrary, every time that he has a spiritual awakening, a strengthening in his serving Hashem he should be aware and believe that this is no more than a gift that Hashem has granted him, neither earned nor deserved. An act of pure loving kindness, that Hashem is constantly granting us because of His unending love for us and the mercy He has upon us. If the Blasphemer had only known this deep spiritual secret, he would have been able to raise himself up literally to the level of Moshe Rabbeinu. Just as the Rambam says in Chapter 7 in Hilchos Teshuva, that Yerovam ben Navat could easily have been as great as Moshe Rabbeinu.

    Therefore, Master of the Universe, please help me to truly believe in and internalize this crucially important fundamental principle, that every fall is specifically designed to bring us to the subsequent ascent that will inevitably follow it, and to never ever forget it!